Om VamPus
- VamPus
- er Heidi Nordby Lunde, feminist, aktivist og Høyre-dame. Mer om Heidi. Kontakt meg på VamPus [a] gmail.com. Merk at kommentarer på innlegg eldre enn fem dager blir moderert - ene og alene for at jeg da får varsel om nye kommentarer. Leser ikke kommentarfeltet på gamle innlegg så ofte. Skriver du som anonym er sjansen stor for at det blir slettet sammen med spam.
13 kommentarer:
Hva med "Berte-skolen"?
(Spør noen med lenger fartstid, om du ikke har hørt om den... ;)
Berte-skolen tror jeg eksisterer fortsatt.. Femina - kanskje mer i retning av inkontinensbind? Høyre trenger hjelp! Dersom noen var usikre på det..
Man kan altså formode at vi, det ærverdige Høire, selv efter alle disse år, formodentlig ennu sliter med et visst "image"-problem (er så underlig med alle disse nymotens ordene som trenger seg inn i vårt lands en gang så stolte og riksmålspregede vokabular.. Nuvel!).
Men hva var det som var så galt med "Berte-skolen"? Berte var jo en alldeles fortreffelig politiker - ja altså, til dame at være...
Nei, slikt forstår jeg meg ikke på. Det er så forvirrende å lese avisene nu til dags - så mye gatesprog. Man vet jo snart ikke opp og ned på noget som helst lengere...
Forum Femina? HJELP! Å, så glad jeg er for at jeg tilhører venstresia akkurat nå...
Yezzzz! Catfight!!! :-)
Hent pils og potetgull, gutter! Noen damer prøver å få til noe, mens noen andre herper: Topp underholdning! Fortsetter de slik, klarer vi dette i etpar århundrer til!
What is the difference between girls/woman aged: 8, 18, 28, 38, 48, 58. 68,
and 78 ?
At 8 -- You take her to bed and tell her a story.
At 18 -- You tell her a story and take her to bed.
At 28 -- You don't need to tell her a story to take her to bed.
At 38 -- She tells you a story and takes you to bed.
At 48 -- She tells you a story to avoid going to bed.
At 58 -- You stay in bed to avoid her story.
At 68 -- If you take her to bed, that'll be a story!
At 78 -- What story??? What bed??? Who the hell are you??
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Hello
Air Freshener
An Avon lady was going in an elevator when she suddenly had to fart. She promptly reached into her bag and sprayed the air with her deodorizer.
Two floors later a gentleman got into the elevator. he began to sniff.
The Avon lady asked' "Do you smell something?"
"Well, yes, I do" he replied.
"What does it smell like?"
"Hmmm, I'm not sure, but it kind of smells like someone shit in a pine tree."
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Martha recently lost her husband. She had him cremated and brought his
ashes home.
Picking up the urn that he was in, she poured him out on the Patio table.
Then, while tracing her fingers in the ashes, she started talking to him....
"Herman, you know that dishwasher you promised me? I bought it with the
insurance money!"
She paused for a minute tracing her fingers in the ashes then said, "Herman,
remember that car you promised me? Well, I also bought it with the
insurance money!"
Again, she paused for a few minutes and while tracing her fingers in the
ashes she said, "Herman, that diamond ring you promised me? Bought it too,
with the insurance money!"
Finally, still tracing her fingers in the ashes, She said, "Herman, remember
that blow job I promised you?"
Well here it comes..........
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Hard Girl
Three girls are sitting around, totally bored so one girl suggests that they make up nicknames for their ideal boyfriends and name them after soda pops.
"I want mine to be 7-Up, 'cause 7 days a week he's up."
"I want mine to be Mountain Dew 'cause when he's in between my mountains, we'll be doing it."
"Mine's gonna be Jack Daniel's."
"You can't do that. Here we are talking about soda pop and you're talking about a hard liquor."
"Exactly."
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Teacher:- "Right, there are five birds sitting on a telephone line. A farmer comes along with his gun and shoots one of them. How many are left?"
Little Johnny:- "None Miss".
Teacher:- "Could you tell me why?"
Little Johnny:- "Well Miss, when the farmer shot the bird, the sound of the gun would have frightened the other birds away".
Teacher:- "Well, the answer I was looking for was four. But I like your thinking."
Little Johnny:- "Miss, while were asking questions, could I ask you one?"
Teacher:- "Its a bit irregular, but go on then"
Little Johnny:- "There are three women sitting on a bench in the park, eating ice lollies. One of them is licking the lolly; one is biting it; and one is putting it in and out of her mouth. Which one is married?"
Teacher (rather embarrassed):- "Err... I suppose it was the last one."
Little Johnny:- "Well Id have said the one with the wedding ring. But I like your thinking."
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A woman goes to the doctor for her yearly physical.
The nurse starts with certain basic items.
"How much do you weigh?" she asks.
"115," she says.
The nurse puts her on the scale.
It turns out her weight is 140.
The nurse asks, "Your height?"
"5 foot 8," she says.
The nurse checks and sees that she only measures 5' 5".
She then takes her blood pressure
And tells the woman it is very high.
"Of course it's high!" she screams,
"When I came in here I was tall and slender!
Now I'm short and fat!"
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A beautiful young lady decided she wanted to get rich quick, so she proceeded to find herself a rich 75-year-old man, planning to screw him to death on their wedding night.
The courtship and wedding went off without any problem, in spite of the half-century age difference. The first night of her honeymoon, she got undressed, and waited for him to come out of the bathroom to come to bed.
When he emerged, however, he had nothing on except a condom to cover a twelve-inch erection, and was carrying a pair of earplugs and a pair of nose plugs. Fearing her plan had gone desperately amiss, she asked, "What are those for?"
The elderly groom replied, "There are two things I can't stand: the sound of a woman screaming, and the smell of burning rubber."
:D:D:D
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Pamela Anderson nudes ...
- She masturbates herself while sitting on the top deck,
and after awhile Tommycomes over and fucks her.
Pamela Anderson seen nude as she kneels on a bed and gives Bret Michaelsoral sex.
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