Om VamPus

Bildet mitt
er Heidi Nordby Lunde, feminist, aktivist og Høyre-dame. Mer om Heidi. Kontakt meg på VamPus [a] gmail.com. Merk at kommentarer på innlegg eldre enn fem dager blir moderert - ene og alene for at jeg da får varsel om nye kommentarer. Leser ikke kommentarfeltet på gamle innlegg så ofte. Skriver du som anonym er sjansen stor for at det blir slettet sammen med spam.

mandag, august 29, 2005

Pokers wedding

Honouring the promise to Poker - that this message should be posted in english so D & N could read it too :

VamPus went to a political debate on Thursday, which ended up in a drinking binge. On Friday she went out with a new set of people for a "Friday beer", just making it home in time to get some sleep before she needed to get on the train to a wedding in Tønsberg. Random stuff was thrown into a bag before she headed in to a taxi and encouraged speeding to make it to the train on time. Upon arrival at the hotel, the rooms weren't ready for checking in - so VamPus had to change in the public toilet next to the reception - which caused some amusement to other visiting guests. Luckily she had managed to get a dress and a pair of shoes with her..

The wedding ceremony went well, although the bride was crying from the moment she entered the aisle to after they got out of the church. VamPus, accused of being "militantly single", takes this as proof that your wedding day is not the happiest day of your life, but that you start seeing your life in reverse the moment you say "I do". The groom underlined this elegantly after they exchanged rings by slamming the case that held the rings shut rather loudly.

The dinner was held in an elegantly decorated lovely old house - perfect surroundings for a wedding. BUT; the "pink song" had 12 verses over two pages. 12 verses. Two pages.
There. Is. No. Excuse. For. That.

After the fourth verse, VamPus had guzzled down her own glass of wine, desperately browsing the table for more. By the seventh verse, VamPus had discretely stolen her friend PM's glass and was happily consuming this and finishing it off just in time to join in on the two last stanzas. In addition, the brides mother had put together a photo presentation of her daughter - from the first new-born picture to a grown woman. This was accompanied by music, and VamPus started rolling her eyes and developing foam around the corner of her mouth when we're six minutes out in the presentation, and the bride has just begun school. VamPus now feels she knows the bride better that the groom - an impressive feat, since we've known each other for at least twelve years. Little known facts about the grooms nick names was revealed - but VamPus does not really know why he was called "The Cheese" (Osten), and do not really want to find out.

Beyond that, the wedding had few unpleasant surprises - but all the ingredients a succesfull wedding should consist of; the beautiful bride and handsome groom, festive decorations, nice food, jolly people, a drunk brides maid and speaches that seemed endless. VamPus found herself situated in the middle of the grooms gambling friends, who unenthusiastic tried to mime the lyrics of the songs, had an evil twist to their laughter when he gave compliments to his mother-in-law during his speach and who, like VamPus, looked equally desperate for the bar when the dinner ended. VamPus can't really recall wether there were any scandals - which, obviously, makes her suspect that she was the scandal. As the photos haven't been developed yet, we'll just have to see. Taking in to account that the wedding was her third day drinking in a row, VamPus is now officially on a detox-regimen.. until the weekend.

10 kommentarer:

David Young sa...

During the photo presentation I did start to wonder whether we were going to re-live the bride's childhood in real time.

DY

Delirium sa...

...og derfor mener jeg den dag i dag at det mest vellykkede brylluppet jeg har vært i var et der både brud og brudgom nektet taler av noen art fra noen som helst. Dette var spesielt heldig ettersom jeg var forlover! *lykkelig pust*

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